So, in Enchantrix Empire, our fun social group, a submissive named hailey has been writing about her experiences as a submissive. She is happily Owned by Mistresses Fiona and Riley. Hailey’s blog is most interesting and I hope you will wander over. Join us in EE and then begin participating. We need you there!
Back to hailey. So as I have been reading through her blog posts, I’m reminded of how I deal with bratty submissives. Thinking you might enjoy reading along as I muse about it all, here I go.,
Watching Bratty Submissives from Afar
Because I was a submissive for a couple of decades, I was able to witness other subbies up close and personal. I was not one of the bratty submissives. I was an absolutely obsequious submissive and always did as I was told. Not that I didn’t try to negotiate some aspects of the relationship, but I did, in the end, acquiesce to my (female) Dom.
However, whenever there were gatherings of our Dungeon or groups of D/s friends, I observed things I would never consider doing. It was common to hear a sub beg for something: something to stop, something to eat, being able to go somewhere. The phrase was the common, “Mistress, I am begging you to be able to go into the pool.” If the Mistress said no, almost always whining would ensue.
Whining makes my teeth grind.
Just like with others, whining works much of the time. It’s annoying and, just to shut the person up, Mistresses or Masters would dismiss the (what I considered) bratty submissive to do whatever they wanted to do. To me, that was rewarding the whining and I took note.
Then I Became the Dominant
As I morphed into my Dominant, Mistress Self, the first time I heard a sub/bottom beg, I knew whining was next. And I was right. I shifted my mindset from my submissive memories of what I’d witnessed all those years and spoke as the Mistress I had become.
If you’ve spoken with me, you know I love to dig into your brain. I want to know what you’re thinking, seeing, feeling, even smelling or tasting. I want the whole sensory experience because I want to join you in your space in time. Your ability to tell me what the thoughts and sensations are helps me to better guide you into or out of the experience we are sharing together. And we are in this together. Even if I am smacking your balls, I am part of the duet of painful music.
Therefore, when you, or any bratty submissives, begin that whining, inside I smile because I am going to dig into that juvenile behavior and make that person use his or her brain. Yes, I know it does pull the subbie folk out of their heads a bit, but it is only for a few moments. Once they have done what I ask, they are free and able to delve even deeper into their submissive place. They are then able to let go and know I am understanding them, not only on the surface, but viscerally – deep inside their psyche.
From Begging to Negotiating
What I want from the submissive I am working with is logic. I want the person to try and convince me they should be allowed to do what they want to do, whether that is diving into the pool or wanting an orgasm.
“Use your words” is a common phrase… followed up with, “Convince me why I should allow you to do this as if you were a lawyer pleading a case.”
Stuttered words begin slowly as they climb back into the the submissive’s mind and they have to work for a few moments. Begging is an easy task and doesn’t require many brain cells, especially when you’re tugging on your dick and wanting to cum. But being clever in trying to talk me into why they should be allowed to <fill in the blank> not only is a distinct challenge for them, but amuses me no end. I love hearing what people say about why they want out of chastity or be allowed to cum after an extended period of not having orgasms.
You Bratty Submissives, What Would You Say?
You ponder this for awhile. How, while you are in a sane, non-begging place, would you logically ask for something you want from a Mistress. Then, the next time we talk, you might be ready for my questions.
That is unless I change my whole strategy,
laughing
Ms Daphne, Love this post!
Depending on the submissive depends on how I address bratty behavior. Often the bratty behavior is because it “worked” at some point. The subbie has few skills to express the need for attention, other than that behavior!
However, if you want to “try on your brat” and engage, as long as I know that’s the “modus operandi” I won’t correct your behavior, in order to eradicate the behavior but will lean in and give you a good dose of “careful what you wish for” Medicine! Tee hee!
Brilliant!
You are a wonderful Mistress, Ms. Erika. Your submissives are blessed to have you near.
Thanks for the comment and friendship.
Hugs!
This is a very interesting article. I think it’s a huge advantage that you have experience from both sides. You can empathize perfectly with both positions.
As for me, it’s strange, but I’ve never been much of a permit begger. I’ve always tried (with humour if possible) to convince her that if she allows me, it will actually be beneficial for her, or I’ll put on an innocent face :). If I see that the so-called train is not running, I stop trying and accept reality as it is. If Mistress orders me to beg, then of course I will comply to please her…:) I don’t know if I’m a brat, but I love my wife and Mistress.
Have a wonderful time Mistress Daphne!
I don’t think you qualify as a brat, love.
One knows a brat when they talk to one. They balk, dig their heels in, try to go around rules, and on and on.
You are pretty similar to how I was as a sub… compliant and gentle.
Thank you Mistress Daphne, I really appreciate it. I have been naughty a few times to be honest and authentic, but I try my best… :)))
Haven’t we all?!?!
Well, you’re right 🙂
With bratty submissives do you put them in bras/panties/wigs/makeup/lipstick heels and dresses
That’s always an option!