Did you know that enjoying anal play does not make you gay? If you thought it did and you have never tried it, well, now is your time to explore!

Sensual Anal Play

The anus, aka the asshole, is an incredibly erogenous place. There are a delightful 8000 nerve endings specifically dedicated to the pleasure of the anus and you can utilize every one of them.

Starting with gentle touching can relax the area, creating a delightful sensation, different than what you might be used to, but so nice, nevertheless. It can be weird at first, but give it a few minutes of stimulation… lubed fingers going in a circular motion then tap-tap-tapping on the area can feel fantastic.

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As you get closer to penetrating through the sphincter muscle, I like to push gently, but not going through… “bouncing” my finger as if I was on a trampoline… very, very gently, but firmly at the same time. This gives the body some time to acclimate that something may be about to enter.

Entering the Body

Slow and steady, are the key words about pushing through the sphincter barrier. The porn movies you see where the guy just rams it into the girl? Those girls have had it up the ass 1000 times. You all, on the other hand, who have never or rarely had anal sex, should go very slowly. There is no rush. No deadline. Should be no clock ticking on the speed of your finishing. Take your time.

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Once again, lube is your best friend for anal play. There really can never be enough used. No skimping! And don’t use anything BUT lube for your lubricant, please.

Once Inside

Again, go slowly. Bring pleasure, even as it might be uncomfortable at first. Sensuous, slow, gentle movements advancing and retreating can be absolutely delicious once the initial “This is such a weird feeling!” sensation subsides.

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Feel the fullness. That is part of the pleasure. Feel how a familiar sensation can really morph into an amazingly sexy feeling. Go with it! Enjoy the experience.

Anal Toys

I discuss safety issues at the end, but want you to see how each of these toys are specifically built for anal play. They all have flanges on the bottom to keep the toy from slipping inside, requiring maneuvers to remove it and sometimes, even a trip to the hospital. They should be FUN, not worrisome.

Anal Sex/Pegging

Pegging deserves its own blog post (I think I’ll write one!), but the dildo has to have a flange in order to stay in the harness on the fucker’s body, thereby alleviating the possible loss of the toy in the fuckee’s asshole.

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Great Ideas & Safety Reminders!

  • Wet wipes are your friend. Keep a stack of wet wipes near… you’ll be glad you did.
  • Using cleansing fluids a couple of hours before play can make the experience less worrisome. However, it is normal to need to have extra clean-up after anal play. It really is no big deal and very common.
  • You can never use too much lube! The rectum does not make its own lubrication, so be generous with the lube. I beg you not to use spit or petroleum jelly or lotion or conditioner. If you have to use something else, olive oil is a decent, but distant, second choice.

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  • Lay down towels when doing anal play to be on the safe side and for easy clean-up.
  • Make sure your fingernails are cut short with no hangnails. The rectum is extremely vulnerable to tearing.
  • Many people choose to use gloves for a variety of reasons: cleanliness, ease of clean-up, not worrying about fingernails, etc.
  • When using toys, it is normal to use condoms on anything being inserted for anal play. Again, ease of clean-up a great reason to do this.

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  • Always, always use condoms if you are going to share the toy with someone else. One condom per person.
  • NEVER put an anal toy in a vagina. Have separate toys for each area. Cleaning can remove some of the anal residue, but not all. It really is important to never put an anal toy in a vagina. It can cause a serious infection.
  • Only use toys with a flange inside the rectum! No bullets without their being inside a vibrating toy with a flange. Be wary of fruit or vegetables because they do not have a flange. If you use them, make sure it is long, you do not push it far in and you keep a tight grip on it. Trips to the hospital to remove toys is neither fun, nor sexy.
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Anal toy with a bullet safely in place.


…have FUN!! Explore this new area. Create a new intimacy with your partner and really get off on some joyful anal play.