Trigger Warning*
Are You Having Anonymous Sex?
I talk to lots of people who put out ads to meet people in order to have sex, most often, anonymously. I worry about them and want them safe. (I want YOU safe, too!)
Whether you are an MSM/straight cocksucker, closeted gay, a sissy, or transwoman..there are some safety concerns I want to talk about when you are having anonymous sex. I’m writing it here so when we are on the phone, I am not ruining your fantasy with reality.
Click to the section you need directly below:
- Devising a Safety Plan to Protect Yourself
- Physical Risks of Anonymous Sex (also read Devising a Safety Plan to Protect Yourself)
- Sexual Risks of Anonymous Sex
- How to Minimize Your Sexual Risks with Anonymous Sex
- How to Get Immediate Help if You are Sexually or Physically Assaulted
- Ways to minimize being arrested
- Ideas for explaining your wounds to your family and friends
- Strategies for staying safe, physically, sexually and emotionally
- How to interact with law enforcement and medical personnel
- Emotional Healing After Physical/Sexual Assault
- A list of Resources for all aspects of sexual, physical and emotional health
* What is “TW” or “Trigger Warning?”
OMG, Ms. Daphne…I am SO glad that you are writing this I can’t even tell you!!! As you said, most often things go just fine but every once in a great while they do not! And like you Ms. Daphne, I also implore you all to listen and put in place these safeguards that Ms. Daphne has laid out in this AMAZING post. NO does mean NO AND always always listen to the little voice inside you saying this just doesn’t feel quite right!
Thank you so very much, Ms. Mandy! It means so much to have your input and understanding of the topic. Thank you for appreciating it. I hope the rest of the series resonates just as much.
loving hugs
Thank you for this series you’re doing. This is so important and amazing. It’s easy to forget that things can go wrong if you aren’t careful and there should always be a plan in place to keep everyone safe and sane and happy.
Ms. Cassidy!
Thank you SO much for reading this! I am really glad you agree that there needs to be at least a smidge of caution when having anonymous sex. I figure if I lay all the negative out in one fell swoop, then people can read, store it for if they need it, then move on to the FUN of having sex!
That is my hope, anyway.
Thank you so much for writing.
Ms. Daphne, leave it up to you to offer up a series that holds such great significance. Thank you – and everything Ms. Cassidy and Ms. Mandy said!
You put right out there the disclaimer that the post deals with “heavy topics” – and they are. They should be attention-grabbing. They should be concerning. …And they NEED to be discussed, before you need the information, not after you wish you’d had it.
It’s all too easy to get so carried away with excitement that being cautious, reasonable, and smart unintentionally get put on the back burner, but you’re putting these important issues back where they belong and giving everyone reminders that we can all use. Be sure that your series is going to make some people stop tomorrow where they might not have done so today.
Oh, Ms. EmmaJane!!!!!! I have tears in my eyes from your words. Everything you say is what I hope for this series.
As I said to Ms. Cassidy, hopefully the information… as seemingly depressing as it can be… will be read and then set aside, to be used if needed. You are right… good to have BEFORE something happens, than after.
But, I also wanted to include resources for those who might have had something happen in the past. It is never too late to heal those emotional wounds.
Thank you so much for adding your great thoughts, too.
gentle hugs
Daphne,
The ladies are spot on, you are brilliant and we need conversations like this! I was asked once “It is safe to post and ad at XYZ, right Mistress?”
Which lead to a conversation very similar to what you’ve done here. You can FIND people anywhere, it’s how you vet them and conduct yourself that makes it safe or not. They hadn’t thought of any of what I mentioned, and realized how dangerous her activities could have been. She thanked me greatly for the advice.
I get how erotic and exciting some of or fantasies are, how they can sometimes take over and help us make really bad decisions for real. One reason why WE ARE HERE! To guide you, help you stay safe while exploring!
Thank you Ms. Daphne! You’re simply the best!!
Ms. Erika! *giant hug*
I am so glad you were there for the girl who asked you that seemingly simple question. I just knew we Mistresses could not possibly tell every client that calls us all the risks and benefits of Anonymous Sex… so had to write something.
I didn’t even cover gang bangs, what to do if another person walks in on you and the guy you are with… so many scenarios that just cannot be covered in a short series like this. Thank you for being there for your clients. Really.
Much love!
Soooo many people should read this.They get all ready to go and risky stuff after hours and hours of being on internet and forget about real life dangers.
sissy aprile nicole,
Thank you so much for understanding why I put these out… not to ruin the fun, but to give thought to it so nothing untoward happens. Yet, we all know, even when we are at the height of our self-awareness, shit happens and we need an alternate plan. I hope I was able to put some ideas out there for that alternate plan.
You are awesome. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts.